A workplace lunch meant to strengthen a client relationship has turned into an online debate after a manager shared a story about correcting his assistant’s dining choices during a meeting.
The manager explained on Reddit, as user Hot_Lab4411, that he hired an assistant named “Amy” at the beginning of the year, praising her work and noting he had already given her a raise.
The original poster (OP) noted that Amy had played a major role in a deal and was invited to join a client lunch to recognize her contribution.
Unhappy Meal
The OP described how the meeting went smoothly overall. However, the manager said he became concerned about how the meal unfolded.
While he and the client ordered burgers and fries, Amy chose a larger meal including steak, mashed potatoes, vegetables and soup.
According to the post, the two men finished their meals well before she did. When the server returned, the client and manager declined dessert, but Amy ordered cheesecake and coffee.
After the meeting, the manager said he spoke privately with Amy to explain what he described as a common strategy during client lunches.
“I explained to her that it is best to follow the client’s lead,” the OP told Redditors this week.
“If they order simple food, we order simple food. If they decline desert, we decline desert.”
The manager said the conversation was meant as guidance, not criticism, and shared examples of his own mistakes early in his career, including once ordering spaghetti and spilling it on his shirt during a business meal.
The discussion apparently ended badly. The manager wrote that Amy began crying and believed the advice was related to her weight, but he reiterated the issue was about business strategy.
‘I would never’
The situation stoked 3,000 comments in debate on Reddit, with many backing the manager’s approach.
“I am also an overweight person,” began a supporter, “I would never ever think of ordering steak if I worked in a client facing job and the client didn’t order something fancy first!”
Another person felt that, “If she wants to be in your field, she needs to know the strategy.”
A fellow commenter agreed: “This was a completely appropriate conversation about learning workplace norms.”
First Impressions
Business etiquette experts say small details during professional meals can affect how a company is perceived by clients.
“In a world that has embraced a more informal style of conducting business, the importance of proper business etiquette cannot be overstated,” Joan Burge, founder of Office Dynamics International, wrote.
“It’s about presenting yourself as a professional, demonstrating respect for others and creating a positive impression that boosts your personal and professional growth.”
Burge added that administrative professionals often represent their executives and organizations during interactions with clients, making their conduct especially visible.
Table manners and meal choices can also play a role in those impressions.
“Whether at a business luncheon or a corporate dinner, good table manners are crucial,” Burge wrote, adding that they, “reflect positively on your professionalism.”
Vital Values
Robert Hosking also points to the value of workplace etiquette when interacting with colleagues and clients.
“Good office manners are vital in any professional setting,” Hosking wrote in Executive Support Magazine.
For the manager who shared his story, he still believes Amy has strong potential.
“The meal did not concern me as much as how she took instruction,” she shared.
“Now I’m wondering if others think I was wrong for bringing it up at all.”
Newsweek has reached out to Hot_Lab4411 for comment via Reddit. We could not verify the details of the case.
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