The Netflix documentary series American Murder: Gabby Petito has put Brian Laundrie’s murder of his fiancé Gabby Petito back in the spotlight, including the notebook where he confessed to killing her.
Brian Laundrie murdered 22-year-old Gabby Petito while they were travelling in a van during a four-month-cross-country trip across America in 2021.
The case captured attention worldwide, and this new docuseries chronicles the tragedy from start to finish.
In 2021 some 4,970 women were victims of murder and nonnegligent manslaughter in the U.S. Data from the Bureau of Justice Statistics found that 34 percent of these women were killed by an intimate partner, and 76 percent of female murder victims were killed by someone they knew.
What To Know
After Petitio disappeared, Laundrie drove a van from Wyoming back to his parents’ home in Florida. He left his home on September 13 and four days later was reported missing.
His remains were found in Florida’s Myakkahatchee Creek Environmental Park on October 20. Laundrie died from a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head.
The FBI recovered a notebook near his remains, as well as some of his other belongings—including a revolver.
What Brian Laundrie’s Notebook Said
Brian Laundrie’s notebook was released by Attorney Steve Bertolino.
The account put forth by Laundrie in the notebook has been disputed by both law enforcement and experts, who say that it doesn’t match up with the investigation’s findings.
The following is a rough transcription of the pages that have been released.
“Gabby, I wish I was right at your side, I wish I could be talking to you right now. I’d be going through every memory we made, getting even more excited for the future. But [we] lost our future. I can’t [live] without you. I’ve lost every day we [could’ve] spent together, every holiday. I’ll never get to play with [illegible] again. Never go hiking with TJ. I loved you more than anything. I can’t bear to look at our photos, to recall great times because it is why I cannot go on. When I close my eyes, I will think of laughing on the roof of the van, falling asleep to the sight of [illegible] at the crystal geyser. I will always love you.”
“If you were reading Gabs’ journal, looking at photos from our life together, flipping through old cards you wouldn’t want to live a day without her. Knowing that everyday you’ll wake up without her, you wouldn’t want to wake up. I’m sorry to everyone this will affect, Gabby was the love of my life, but I know [adored] by many. I’m so very sorry to her family because I love them. I’d [consider] her younger siblings my best of friends… I am sorry to my family, this [is] a shock to them as well a terrible grief.”
“They loved as much, if not more than me. A new daughter to my mother, an aunt to my nephews. Please do not make this harder for them, this [occurred] as an unexpected tragedy. Rushing back to our car trying to cross the streams of [illegible] before it got too dark to see, too cold. I hear a splash and a scream. I could barely see. I couldn’t find her for a moment, shouted her name. I found her breathing heavily, gasping [illegible.] She was freezing cold. [Illegible] the blazing hot national parks in Utah.”
“The temperature had dropped to freezing and she was soaking wet. I carried her as far as I could from the stream toward the car, stumbling, exhausted in shock, when my [illegible] and knew I couldn’t safely carry her. I started a fire and spooned her as close to the heat. She was so thin, had already been freezing too long. I couldn’t at the time realize that I should’ve started a fire first but I wanted her out of the cold back to the car. From where I started the fire I had no idea how far the car might be, only knew it was across the creek.”
“When I pulled Gabby out of the water, she couldn’t tell me what hurt. She had a small [bump] on her forehead that [eventually] got larger. Her feet hurt, her [wrist] hurt but she was freezing, shaking violently. While carrying her she continually made sounds of pain. Laying next to her she said little, [lapsing] between violent shakes, gasping in pain, begging for an end to her pain. She would fall asleep and I would shake her awake, fearing she shouldn’t close her eyes if she had a concussion.”
“She would wake in pain, start her whole painful cycle again [illegible] furious that I was the one waking her. She wouldn’t let me try to cross the creek, thought like me that the fire would go out in her sleep and she’d freeze. I don’t know the extent of Gabby’s injuries, only that she was in extreme pain. I ended her life, I thought it was merciful, that it is what she wanted but I see now all the mistakes I made. I panicked, I was in shock. But from the moment I decided, took away her pain, I knew I couldn’t go on without her.”
“I rushed home to spend any time I had left with my family. I wanted to drive north and let James or TJ kill me but I wouldn’t want them to spend time in jail over my mistake, even though I’m sure they would have liked to. I am ending my life not because of a fear of punishment but rather because I can’t stand to live another day without her. I’ve lost our whole future together, every moment we could have [shared.] I’m sorry for everyone’s loss. Please do not make life harder for my family, they lost a son and a daughter. The most wonderful girl in the world. Gabby I’m sorry.”
What People Are Saying
The Laundrie family’s attorney Steve Bertolino put out this statement when he released the notebook: “Today the Petito family attorney, Patrick Reilly, and myself met with the FBI in Tampa to sort through and take possession of the personal items that belonged to Gabby and Brian. This was a previously agreed upon exchange to enable both the Petitos and the Laundries to receive what belonged to their respective children. As part of this return of property in FBI custody I was given Brian’s notebook. I would like to share with the public the note that the FBI alluded to when they said on January 21, 2022 that Brian claimed responsibility for the death of Gabby Petito. Although I have chosen to release this letter as a matter of transparency I will not be commenting further as there are still proceedings pending in Court. These are Brian’s words.”
Ahead of the documentary’s release, Nicole Schmidt, Petito’s mother told Tudum: “When you’re watching a documentary like this, remember that it’s not just a story. It’s not just entertainment for you; it’s not just ‘true crime.'”
“Remember that there are always real lives involved and that these things can happen to anyone.”
What’s Next
The FBI and Petito’s family have raised questions over Laundrie’s account shared in the notebook pages.
Anyone seeking help should call the National Domestic Violence Hotline, a free and confidential hotline available 24/7. It can be reached on 1-800-799-7233 or TTY 1-800-787-3224. The hotline also provides information on local resources. For more information visit thehotline.org.
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